-naide ～ないで

In Japanese, naide ないで is a phrase created from the auxiliary adjective nai ない plus the particle de で. It has a number of different functions, the most common one being to ask people not do something.

Tabenaide!! 食べないで！！ - Kaban-chan from anime Kemono Friends けものフレンズ

Anime: "Kemono Friends," Kemono Furenzu けものフレンズ

tabenai-de kudasai! 食べないでください！
Please don't eat me!
— Kaban-Chan.

Negative Request

The most common use of naide ないで is to ask people not to do something. What this means exactly varies. It can range from "please don't do this," to "I don't want you to do this," to "stahp! Don't do that!"

taberu 食べる
To eat.
tabenai 食べない
To not eat.
tabenaide!!! 食べないで！！！
Don't eat me!!!
(or don't eat this/that/him/her/etc.)

korosu 殺す
To kill.
korosanaide 殺さないで
Don't kill [me].
shinu 死ぬ
To die.
shinanaide 死なないで
Don't die.
Please don't die! Don't get yourself killed! Come back alive, MC-kun, the love of my life!!! When this all ends, let's get married. Etc.

baka ni suru 馬鹿にする
To take someone for an idiot. To make a fool of someone.
baka ni shinaide 馬鹿にしないで
Don't make a fool [of me].
Stop lying to me. Stop joking. (specially when someone says something absurd, like their classmate is a God or something like that.)

Manga: Kaguya-sama wa Kokurasetai ~Tensai-Tachi no Ren'ai Zunousen~ かぐや様は告らせたい～天才たちの恋愛頭脳戦～ (chapter 4)

Context: Kaguya is asked a quiz question that's too easy for a genius like her, and congratulated after getting it right.
baka ni shinaide kudasai......
馬鹿にしないでください･･････
[Don't take me for an idiot.]
konna komodo-muke no mondai
tokete touzen desu...
こんな子供向けの問題
解けて当然です･･･
A question [made] for kids like this,
solving [it] is [only] natural...

watashi no koto wasurenaide 私のこと忘れないで
Don't forget about me.
(phrase used in romances before lovers part ways.)
uso wo tsukanaide 嘘をつかないで
Don't lie. Don't tell falsehoods.
nanimo shinaide 何もしないで
Don't do anything.
kega shinaide 怪我しないで
Don't get hurt.
Don't injury [yourself.]

One thing about these negative requests is that, they're not just negative in the grammatical sense, they're also negative in the "this sounds negative" sense. Because you only tell someone to "not do this" if they're doing or about to do something you don't want them to do. Which means some of these words are used in some pretty sad contexts:

okoranaide 怒らないで
Don't get angry [at me].
naguranaide 殴らないで
Don't hit [me].
sawaganaide 騒がないで
Don't make a fuss.
kikanaide 聞かないで
Don't ask.
minaide 見ないで
Don't look.
konaide 来ないで
Don't come [toward me].
Don't approach [me].
toranaide 撮らないで
Don't take [photos/videos].
hashiranaide 走らないで
Don't run.
nigenaide 逃げないで
Don't run away.
nenaide 寝ないで
Don't sleep.
tatakawanaide 戦わないで
Don't fight. Don't battle.
barasanaide バラさないで
Don't tell (others something that's a secret.)
Don't snitch. Don't expose.
akiramenaide 諦めないで
Don't give up.

But then again, sometimes it's because the character is just hates whomever they're talking to.

kiyasuku hanashikakenaide 気安く話しかけないで
Don't start talking [to me] familiarly.
- This is Japanese for:
- Don't talk to me unless it's something important.
- No chit-chat.

Naide Kudasai ないでください

Generally speaking, naide is synonymous with naide kudasai ないでください, although the nuance is slightly different.

, and naide kure ないでくれ, although the nuance is different.

sawaru 触る
To touch.
sawaranaide 触らないで
Don't touch [me].
sawaranai-de kudasai 触らないでください
Please don't touch [me]. (polite.)

Naide Kure ないでくれ

The word kure くれ, imperative form of the auxiliary kureru くれる, can be used instead of kudasai ください. Unlike kudasai, kure isn't polite.

sawaranai-de kure 触らないでくれ
Please don't touch [me].

Naide Kureru ないでくれる

The auxiliary kureru can be used with naide too. But in this case, in anime, it often transmits a rather annoyed sentiment.

sawaranai-de kureru? 触らないでくれる？
Can you please not touch [me]?
(seriously, piss off you creep.)

Naide Moraemasuka ないでもらえますか

The word maraemasuka is the doubt particle ka か plus moraemasu もらえます, which is the polite conjugation of moraeru もらえる, which is the potential conjugation of morau もらう. Basically:

morau もらう
To have.
moraeru もらえる
Can have. May have.
moraemasu もらえます
Can have. May have. (polite.)
moraemasuka もらえますか
Can have? May have? (polite.)

When combined with naide, the phrase naide moraemasuka is used to politely ask if you can have someone else not do something for you. For example:

Manga: Karakai Jouzu no Takagi-san からかい上手の高木さん

ano... Takagi-san,
あの…　高木さん、
Erm... Takagi.
kono koto wa darenimo
iwanai-de
moraemasuka...
このことは誰にも
言わないで
もらえますか…
May [I] have you not talk about this thing to anyone...?
- Can you please not talk about this to anyone...?
- Can you keep this between us two...?
- Can you keep this a secret...?

Naide Hoshii ないでほしい

The word naide can also come before other auxiliaries like hoshii 欲しい:

kenka shinai-de hoshii ケンカしないでほしい
[I] want [y'all] not to quarrel.
I'd like it if you two didn't fight.

You may notice this all resembles the te-form of verbs: sawatte kudasai 触ってください means "please touch." The kudasai goes directly after the te-form, the same way it goes directly after the naide.

Furthermore, sawatte 触って alone can mean a "touch" as a command, in the imperative. Likewise, you could say sawaranaide is a negative command rather than a negative request, a negative imperative.

So naide is practically a te-form, isn't it? But wait... nai already has a te-form! It's nakute! Why does nai have two te-forms? And most importantly: what's the difference between naide and nakute?

ないで vs. なくて

Basically, there are cases naide ないで and nakute なくて are interchangeable: you can use one or the other, because their meanings overlap, but that's not always. For example, in this case they mean the same thing:

makenakute yokatta 負けなくて良かった
makenai-de yokatta 負けないで良かった
Having not lost was good.
[It's a] good [thing I] didn't lose.

One big difference between that naide ないで can be used with auxiliary verbs, but nakute can't.

makenai-de-iru 負けないでいる
To be not losing.
makenakute-iru 負けなくている
(wrong!)

The rule above includes kudasai ください. That is, although kudasai looks like an i-adjective, because it ends with -i ～い, it's actually a conjugation of the verb kudasaru くださる, so you use it after naide, not after nakute.

makenai-de kudasai 負けないでください
Please don't lose!
makenakute kudasai 負けなくてください.
(wrong!)

Different Ways to Use

To understand naide ないで better, let's take a look at the following phrases:

shukudai wo shinai-de okorareta 宿題をしないで怒られた
Got scolded for not having done the homework.
shukudai wo shinai-de gakkou ni itta 宿題をしないで学校にいった
Went to school not having done the homework.
shukudai wo shinai-de geemu bakari shiteiru 宿題をしないでゲームばかりしている
Playing games all the time not having done the homework.

All three of them share the first part: shukudai wo shinai-de, "not having done the homework." But the meaning is slightly different in each.

In the first example, we have the classic consequential te-form. You "got scolded," okorareta. Why? Because you did "not do the homework," shukudai wo shinai. In this case, and in this case alone, you can replace naide for nakute.

shukudai wo shinakute okorareta 宿題をしなくて怒られた
Got scolded for not having done the homework.
Homework do not, thus got scolded.

In the second example, the de particle is joining two parallel things: the situation and the action. The situation is that you did "not do the homework." And the action is that you "went to school," gakkou ni itta. In other words, having not done the homework, you went to school.

A more direct example:

kekkon shinai-de shinda 結婚しないで死んだ
Not having married, died.
Died without having married.

But a phrase like this has a bunch of problems.

First off, it's ambiguous with "died of not marrying," even though something weird like that is pretty unlikely to be the case. Second off, although it's grammatically correct, it sounds weird, and there's a lot of better ways to say something like that:

kekkon sezu ni shinda 結婚せずに死んだ
Died without marrying.
kekkon shinai mama shinda 結婚しないまま死んだ
Died still not married.

Anyway, the third example, although grammatically identical, has the nuance of a complaint instead. The format, "you don't do X, you keep doing Y instead," is often always a complaint about somebody's behavior.

benkyou shinai-de anime bakkari miteru 勉強しないでアニメばっかり見てる
Doesn't study, watches anime all the time.

You can also reverse the phrase pattern above to ask someone to stop doing something and go do something else instead.

anime bakkari minai-de benkyou shiro アニメばっかり見ないで勉強しろ
Don't watch anime all the time, go study.